All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
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