we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
Randomize
