Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
It's like God shit irony all over that family
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
Randomize
