Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
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