Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
17 year olds will be the death of me.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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