Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
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