He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
Randomize
