I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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