Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
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