It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
