i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
No one should have to go to work between Christmas and New Years, but here I am twirling in my office chair and putting Jack in my coffee like I’m back in college studying for finals.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
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