i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
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