What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
