Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize
