"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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