"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize