So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
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