Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?
Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
Randomize
