I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
Randomize
