fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
dear vagina, thank you for making it so goddamn hard to get pregnant. i love you.
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
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