is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
When did angry sex become our thing?
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
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