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• (586): View more from Michigan

  Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it

  (586): View more from Michigan

  We did he did.

  (586): View more from Michigan

  When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers

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• (202): View more from Washington, DC

  I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.

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• (513): View more from Ohio

  I hate bills.

  (479): View more from Arkansas

  Like ones you have to pay or people named William?

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• (925): View more from California

  I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be

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• (702): View more from Nevada

  Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.

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• (502): View more from Kentucky

  After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.

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• (404): View more from Georgia

  like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.

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• (778): View more from British Columbia

  Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.

  (778): View more from British Columbia

  Feel free to use me as a reference.

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• (706): View more from Georgia

  I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.

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• (519): View more from Ontario

  You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned

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• (813): View more from Florida

  He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm

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• (530): View more from California

  hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back

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• (716): View more from New York

  Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.

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• (+61): View more from Australia

  Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.

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