She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
