I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
Randomize