I don't usually arrange sex via text message
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
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