he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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