just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Randomize
