I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
Randomize
