I'll bet she douches with gravy.
i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Randomize
