We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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