She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
