Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
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