Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
I just gift wrapped bread.
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
Randomize