just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
im drinking this country out of the recession.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
Randomize
