Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
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