She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
Randomize
