did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Randomize
