VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
Randomize
