Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Randomize
