i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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