the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
Randomize
