go do what you do best...puke behind churches
thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
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