Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
Randomize
