Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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