Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
I just opened my filing cabinet at work for the first time in months. It looks just like my pantry: nothing but peanut butter and whiskey.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
