i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
Randomize