bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
Randomize
