he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
Randomize
