I feel like I'm in dance class right now
I'm dying. Please wear something slutty to my funeral.
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
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