Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize