Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
